A Frozen Crust on my Computer Screen
At times, why does facing a computer screen make me fearful? I sit to do something that I love to do but can’t begin? Does it happen to you too, whether you are a writer or not? Does it feel that your talent and skill have dried up, never to blossom and grow again?
It happens to me. But I also know that this feeling is fleeting. I usually experience it due to some emotional disturbance or a cognitive knot. The interference forms like a frozen crust over my computer screen reflecting my inside. The emotional or intellectual imbalance may be mild or massive but it’s affect squeezes out the zest that I have for my work.
In your life, at one time or another, you too must have faced frozen moments, outside reflecting your interior. If you have been down in this manner, try to summon the courage within. All of us have it in store and we are capable of summoning it.
Once summoned, I give myself five minutes. I become aware of myself. Pay attention to what I am feeling. Pay heed to what I am thinking. Sense the skin covering my body. Slowly, my fragmented self integrates into my whole self, the way it was meant to be.
I sit still in silence. Take long and deep breaths. Just for five precious minutes! Or more. I repeat this sitting still in silence and solitude until the day when my body feels unclogged, mind clear and heart open. Finally, I sit down to write on the computer screen and the curser begins to blink again. Words begin to stream from my creative depth. I write what passes through my mind and am amazed. Try it!
If you do, you will be amazed to discover what surges through your fingers! You freely jot down or scribble a few pages the way most writers do. If you do, it will surprise you to read what has gushed through you.
Behind that frozen crust of void are memories and stories that have surfaced because of the recent emotional disturbance or cognitive knot. They are trying to tell you something significant. Be sensitive toward those stories, those images. Mull over what they say. Go wherever they lead you. Do whatever they suggest.
Such insights and intuitions are natures way to lead us on the right path.